The Sinner and The Saint
by allhailthehutch
Summary: Another thing that I've grown up knowing is that you must not sin. If you sin then you go to Hell. At least that's what my parents have always told me.


**I don't know why I always do this to myself. I get these ideas and then I just start writing. This is part one of ...I don't even know what. I hope you guys like it. Reviews are life! xoxox Kelly**

I don't mind working in the bakery. Honestly, it can be a lot of fun, and I'm pretty good at decorating cakes, but when all my friends are out enjoying their summer vacations at the beach and I'm stuck inside—well, it really sucks.

The positive side is that I'm saving up a lot of money for the apartment I plan to rent in Atlanta when I move there in the fall. I need to get out of this town. I've been here my whole life, and I'm ready to see what else is out there.

My parents aren't thrilled with the idea of me leaving, but nothing they say will convince me to change my mind. I need to get out of Panem, Georgia. Every single moment I spend here, I feel myself slowly dying.

There's so much out in the world to explore. I've missed out on a lot growing up. When I was younger, I wasn't really aware of the life I was missing out on, but once I got to high school and saw the other kids having fun, I knew that I needed a change.

My parents are strict, Bible-fearing people and spend most of their free time in church volunteering. God and church mean everything to my parents.

Another thing that I've grown up knowing is that you must not sin. If you sin then you go to Hell. At least that's what my parents have always told me.

Cursing is wrong.

Drinking is wrong.

Premarital sex is the worst sin, though. Mom says that will send you straight to Hell. I've never had sex. My girlfriend Delly attends the same church as I do. She's pretty and I really like her, but the most we've ever done is hold hands. I try to tell myself that the desires I feel for her are wrong, but that doesn't stop the dreams that leave my underwear and sheets soaked with that familiar white sticky substance.

I've heard guys at school talking about something you can do to prevent that from happening, but it sounds a lot like a sin. I know what my parents say and what the Bible says, but the desire flowing through my veins is overwhelming. In my dreams, when Delly finally puts her soft hands on me, the feeling is unlike any other. How can something that feels so good be wrong?

I don't bother asking my parents because they will just give me Bible verses to read. That's their answer for everything.

The familiar chime of the door opening breaks me from my thoughts. "Welcome to Mellark's. How can I help you?" I say with the fake enthusiasm my mother just loves.

"I need to order a birthday cake." I look up to see the voice speaking to me. Her thick, dark hair flows down her back in curly waves, and her eyes—they are the most unique shade of gray I've ever seen. She's beautiful. The most beautiful woman I have ever seen in my entire life.

Her shirt is cut very low, and I do my best to avoid staring at her breasts, but they are spectacular. Delly never wears shirts like this. She always covers up.

My face feels warm, and I hope that my cheeks aren't red. "Uh, I can help with that." I cringe at the sound of my voice cracking.

"I would hope so. This is a bakery after all," she says with a smirk. "It's Peeta, right?" she says, gesturing to my name tag.

"Uh–yeah."

I clear my throat before grabbing a pen and paper to write down the details of what her order will be. She's stunning. I've never seen her around before. I wonder if she just moved here.

I shouldn't be thinking about her in this way. I have a girlfriend. It's wrong. "When do you need the cake by?"

"Next weekend. It's really simple. I just need vanilla with buttercream icing. Maybe some pretty flowers or whatever." She pushes her hair back, revealing her the olive colored skin on her long neck.

I would love to put my lips...

"I can take care of that for you." I'll make sure it's the best cake I've ever made. "I just need your name for the order."

"Katniss. Katniss Everdeen."

She leaves the bakery without saying anything else. I'm left dazed and wondering who is this woman and why have I never seen her before.

Mom scowls from the register, watching me closely. I didn't do anything wrong, but she'll find some way to say I did. She always does.

"Peeta, you know that lusting after a woman is a sin in the eyes of God," she says while tapping her fingers on the countertop. "Maybe you should go pray and ask God to forgive you."

I nod my head nervously. My palms are sweaty, and my throat feels dry. I should have known my mom would see how I was looking at Katniss. "I wasn't lusting after her."

"Oh, so now you are going to lie to me?" she says, slamming her hands down. "You are having impure thoughts about an older woman. I'm not a fool, Peeta."

I shut my eyes, wishing I could be anywhere but here. "I was just helping her with a cake order," I say softly. "I wasn't–I don't want to sin."

"God is always watching," she reminds me. "Please, don't be more of a disappointment to this family."

Mom is right. Looking at Katniss is wrong. I shouldn't have done it. I need to forget about her and focus on getting out of here. Katniss is a distraction and I can't have that.

I can't.

* * *

My thoughts have been consumed with Katniss since the moment she left the bakery. I can't stop picturing her pouty lips and mysterious eyes.

I've tried to forget about her, I have, but every single time I close my eyes, I see her face. She's captivated me in a way no one ever has. We only talked for a few minutes, but in those moments I experienced something completely unfamiliar to me.

I've noticed women before, but Katniss is different. She has me hypnotized. I feel guilty because of Delly, but I can't ignore the fast beating in my chest every time I think of Katniss.

My room feels awfully hot, and I wonder if the air conditioner broke again. I kick off my sheets and comforter, trying to cool down. I close my eyes to try and sleep, but all I see is her face and her breasts. Those soft, fleshy mounds that I desperately want to put my hands on.

I know I shouldn't have been looking at her in that way. It's wrong. Still, no matter what I do and how hard I try to fight off the feelings, I still want to know how soft her skin would feel in my hands. I've imagined Delly before but never like this.

My boxers begin to tighten as I think of her. I'm not supposed to do anything about it. I ignore the urges and focus on God or something like that, but my hand twitches against my thigh, and I wonder if one time wouldn't be so bad.

Feeling pleasure shouldn't be a sin. Why would God make it feel good if He didn't want us to enjoy it?

I let out a shaky, nervous breath as my body temperature continues to climb. Katniss' face is teasing me, her pouty lips inviting me to taste her. I bet she's a good kisser. I wouldn't know the difference anyway. The throbbing in my shaft won't go away, and the temptation to run my hand along the sensitive flesh is consuming my mind.

My eyelids eventually become heavy, and exhaustion finally overcomes me as I fall back asleep.

The bright morning sun stings my eyes, causing them to water. I push back my sheets and find that familiar sticky substance all over the place. It's more than I've ever had before. I quickly grab my sheets and throw them into the hamper, along with my underwear.

My dreams were filled with images of Katniss. I should feel guilty about these impure thoughts. What would Delly think of me if she knew? I run a hand through my mess of curls with a frustrated sigh. Spending the morning in church isn't exactly what I want, but if I skip my parents will never let me hear the end of it.

All I will be thinking about is Katniss.

I'll be counting down the minutes until I'll see her again. I quickly glance at my alarm clock, seeing that I only have 20 minutes to get ready for church.

Mom will murder me if I'm late.

* * *

I shake hands and greet the fellow congregation, but I'm tired from a restless night full of dreams that I shouldn't be having. Mom is busy talking to the choir ladies, and Dad is talking to Mr. Cartwright, leaving me to sit in the uncomfortable pew waiting for the service to start.

I don't see Delly. She must already be teaching her Sunday school class. It's probably best that I don't see her right now. I care about her, but I'm not in love with her. She's who my parents want me with.

"Good morning Peeta." I turn quickly to see Katniss standing in the middle aisle, wearing a tight fitting green dress that would make my mother squirm. "I didn't know you went to Our Lady of Peace."

I run my hand through my curls nervously, trying to avoid staring at her cleavage which is perfectly displayed. "I've been coming here my whole life," I tell her. "I don't think I've–uh ever seen you here before."

"It's my first time," she answers with a smile. "I wanted to see what all the fuss is about."

I can see Mom watching me like a hawk, her eyes two very narrow slits. "I hope you have a nice time," I say politely.

"Well, I'm glad I know someone here." She rests a hand on my shoulder, causing my stomach muscles to tighten and my body to start sweating. "Anyway, I'm gonna go grab a seat. I'll talk to you later, baker boy."

I watch as Katniss saunters away, sitting in the seat directly across the aisle from me. Trying to avoid her eyes is an impossible task. I can't stop staring.

She looks over at me and smiles. I thought what I felt for her was a simple crush, but it's beginning to feel much deeper than that.

I also know that my mother is furious with me, and I should prepare myself for her wrath.

* * *

The sticky, humid summer air mixed with the heat from all the ovens makes working today almost impossible. I've been spending the better part of my morning at the front register, which wasn't what I wanted to do. I should be working on Katniss' order. It can't be rushed. I want it to be the perfect dessert that she'll never forget.

When the bell above the door rings, I look up preparing to do the typical greeting, but then I see it's Katniss.

She's wearing a dress like she was at church. But it's a soft orange color that reminds me of a sunset. Her tan, firm legs torture me as she makes her way to the front of the store.

"Hi, what can I get you?" I ask, my voice trembling slightly.

Katniss lets out a huff while slamming her wallet down on the counter. "I've had a terrible day, and all I want is something delicious, loaded with calories, and freshly made. Do you think you can help me with that?"

I nod with a loud gulp. "Do you want something salty or sweet?"

She cocks her eyebrow with a smile. Did I say something funny? She shrugs her shoulders with a soft laugh. "Why don't we start with sweet and perhaps move on to salty?"

"Okay, I'll be right back." I can't help but notice the way her expression seems almost playful. I go to the back and grab one of the freshly made cinnamon buns.

When I come back, Katniss is leaning over the counter, her breasts practically spilling out of her top. "I think this will hit the spot," I tell her proudly.

"Oh, I'm sure it will...for now," she says, grabbing the dessert from my hand. With a smile, she dips her finger in the icing, swirling it around. When her finger is completely covered, she sucks the glaze off her finger slowly, staring me in the eye as she does it. "Mmm, this is absolutely amazing. Did you make this?"

"I make almost everything in the bakery."

My body is going to betray me soon. I can feel my lower half begin to swell. I try to think of anything but her lips, but it's impossible. "You are very talented with your hands, aren't you Peeta?"

"I–uh I guess so," I stammer nervously. My erection is pressing so hard against my jeans, and if I take a step back, she'll see. "Maybe I can show you sometime?"

She leans in closer, making it so that I can see directly down her shirt. "I have time right now if you do."

I open my mouth, but no words come out. Sweat drips down my forehead, and my cheeks feel warm. The aching in my shaft is unbearable. It's never felt like this before.

"Is everything okay? You seem a little nervous."

"No, it's cool," I reassure her with a smile. "I'd love to show you a couple of things. I can start with simple stuff, like cupcakes, and then we can go from there."

I'm expecting her to agree, but when she begins laughing, I wonder what I said that's so funny. She notices my puzzled expression and stops. "Peeta, I was talking about fucking you. I don't want to learn to bake."

"Wha–what?"

This has to be some kind of dream. Things like this don't happen in my life. It can't happen. Katniss smiles at me, running her fingers through the ends of my hair and tugging them gently. How can I tell her that touching her, even thinking about it, is a sin?

"I want you Peeta," she says while licking her lips. "I've wanted you since the moment I saw you."

"I–you want me?" I ask shyly. "I'm nothing special. You are so beautiful, Katniss."

Katniss takes a step back from the counter, turning on her heel to come back around to where I'm standing. The bulge in my pants obviously shows, and I know she sees it by the smirk on her lips. She presses against me, her hands resting on my hips.

"It sure feels like you want this," she whispers, gesturing to my erection. "Tell me, why you are denying the obvious connection we have?"

Her lips are dangerously close to mine. If I just lean forward a tiny bit, we'll be kissing. I can hear my parents' voices telling me this isn't right. I'll go to hell for my behavior. "It's a sin!" I blurt out nervously.

She's going to laugh. I know she saw me in church, but a lot of people go to church and still have sex. I can't do it. I close my eyes, releasing a shaky breath. Why did I have to say anything? I should have just run away and not opened my mouth.

"I can't be with a woman until I'm married," I tell her, remembering the dozens of conversations my parents have had with me. "It's what the Bible says, and I have to follow it."

Katniss is quiet for what feels like an eternity. She chews her bottom lip, sucking it between her teeth. Finally, she says something. "So, you've never even kissed a girl then?"

I shake my head. "Please, can you just go? This is already bad enough, and I don't need you judging me or laughing at me."

"Shh." She presses her fingers to my lips. "I could never laugh at you, Peeta. Can you answer me a question?"

"Of course."

She rests her hand on my cheek, and I feel my body pulse with pleasure at the simple contact. "Do you truly believe it's a sin, or do you just tell yourself it is to make your parents happy? What do you want, Peeta? You can tell me the truth."

"I–I want you, but I'm afraid." I've never considered going against my beliefs, but with Katniss I'm willing to turn my back for just a simple taste of what she has to offer. "I've never wanted anything more in my entire life."

She cups my chin in her hand, brushing her thumb along my cheek bone. "It's okay to be afraid. You aren't doing anything wrong. You're allowed to want this."

It all happens in slow motion, her mouth pressing against mine, the taste of sugar icing still lingering on her lips. I stand there frozen and unsure of what to do. Her tongue glides along my lip, and instinctively I open my mouth. I gasp when her tongue begins to massage mine.. Should I reciprocate her movements? When I move my tongue against hers, and a soft moan escapes her, I know I'm doing the right thing.

A tingling spreads from the base of my spine, down my legs and back up to my shaft. It feels so good. Her hand trails down my chest and stomach, stopping right where all the pleasure is building up.

Katniss pulls away, her lips red and puffy. "Peeta, have you ever touched yourself? Made yourself come?"

"What's that?"

I can't focus on anything but the painful throbbing. It needs to go away. "Have you ever taken your cock in your hand and jerked it till you had an orgasm?"

"No–no I–it's a sin," I say, trying to reassure myself, but it's not really working. "I've woken up sometimes after having dreams..."

She giggles against my lips. "I assure you that what I plan to do will feel much better than a wet dream. Is that something you want?"

I've denied myself pleasure for a very long time. I'm not even sure I believe what my parents have taught me. All I know is that Katniss makes me feel alive. I can't forgive myself if I don't take this chance with her.

If I go to Hell, at least it will be worth it.

"We can't do this now," I pant. "Come back later. I don't want to be interrupted."

Katniss presses a hot, opened mouth kiss to my neck. I don't want to send her away, but if my parents find me with her, they will kill me. I can't let anything ruin this moment. "I'll come back," she promises. "I've had a taste, and I need more."

She seals our deal with a quick kiss on my lips, and then she's gone before I even have a chance to say goodbye.

* * *

The hours drag by slowly, every minute a torturous reminder of my waiting for Katniss to come back. It was the hardest thing in the world telling her to stop, but I want this to be perfect. I'm not sure what's going to happen when she gets here.

I press my fingers to my lips, remembering the way Katniss kissed me. It was better than I ever imagined a kiss could be. The way her tongue slipped in my mouth with ease, tasting me. How could something that makes me feel so incredible be wrong?

Maybe Katniss is right. I'm not sure what I believe, but following what my parents teach has always been easy. When Katniss stands in front of me though, I'm completely powerless.

I want to feel that pulsing tension between my legs, that aching pleasure that I've never let myself full enjoy. Katniss says what she plans will feel better than those dreams I constantly have. When she was pressed up against me, I was so close to coming undone, but pulling away from her was like dumping a bucket of ice water over my head.

Closing time comes, and Katniss still isn't back yet. What if she changed her mind? I throw my apron on the table, sighing loudly. I shouldn't have sent her away. She probably thinks I don't want her.

"You look deep in thought," she says with a chuckle. "Did you think that I forgot?"

I shrug, rubbing the back of my neck nervously. "I wasn't–I may have thought it for just a second..."

She's still wearing the dress from earlier. "Peeta, I want you. You should feel how wet I am for you."

"I–you are?" I ask softly. I'm not exactly sure what she means, but I don't want to look stupid. It must be a good thing if she's telling me.

Katniss nods, making her way over to me. "I can't wait for your fingers to touch me," she presses her hands to my chest, cocking her head to side with a smirk. "Remember I said I'm gonna make you feel good. Do you still want me to do that?"

How can I say no? My cock–that's what Katniss says–is already pressing against my jeans. It hurts from constantly getting hard and not doing anything about it all day. "Yes, please," I choke out.

"It hurts, doesn't it?" she asks with a frown. All I can do is nod in response. The ache between my legs is mind numbing. Her delicate fingers slowly begin to undo my belt buckle, and my heart thumps against my chest. "You're all worked up and haven't taken care of yourself."

I'm trembling when her hands unzip my jeans and push them past my hips and down to the floor. I've never been this exposed before. We're behind the counter, but thankfully it's dark in here, and the front blinds are closed. I don't know what I would do if someone saw. "Tell me what you want, Peeta," she whispers against my lips. "I want to know what you need me to do."

My mind immediately goes to Delly, who I've forgotten about in my haze of lust. I shouldn't do this with Katniss, but Delly would never talk to me this way or let me touch her. My parents want me to be with her. It's not what I want. Katniss is what I want.

"I want to touch you."

She grabs my shaking hand and places it over her breast. It's through her dress, but this is more than I ever thought would happen. I squeeze it hesitantly, marveling in how soft it feels. Her breast fits perfectly in my palm. "Do you want me to get naked?"

It's hard to speak so all I do is nod like an idiot. I've never seen a naked woman before. My imagination and some pictures from my school biology books is all I've ever had to go on.

Katniss takes a step back and slides the thin straps of her dress off her shoulders. In a swift motion, her dress falls to the floor, and she's standing in front of me completely naked.

The thick patch of curls between her legs glistens with a wetness that is also spreading down her thighs. Her breasts are better than I could ever imagine. They aren't that big. Her nipples are tight and pebbled. She's exquisite. How can one woman be so beautiful?

"I–you're so perfect." I reach out with both hands to cup her bare breasts. They feel so silky in my calloused hands. I rub my thumb over her nipple, causing Katniss to moan in response.

I'm nearing complete insanity at this point. The wet spot on the front of my underwear is clear evidence of how my body responds to Katniss. I don't know what I want her to do, but I need to feel some type of relief soon.

"I'm gonna show you how to take care of yourself when I'm not there, okay?" She hooks her thumbs in the elastic waistband of my underwear, shoving them down to the ground with my jeans.

My erection springs free, and the relief of not being confined by those tight shorts is good enough. Clear liquid oozes from the tip and Katniss smiles. "I knew you would have a big cock."

She reaches for my hand with her own, sliding it down my chest and stopping right at my shaft. "Wrap your hand around it," she instructs. When my fingers come in contact with the sensitive, fleshy skin, an immediate electric charge surges through me. Embarrassing sounds leave my mouth when her thumb rubs circles around the head, spreading the liquid around slowly. "You like that, don't you?"

Is that what I've been missing? Katniss places her hand over mine, which is practically squeezing my cock. "All you need to do is move your hand up and down."

I start moving my hand up and down like she said. My movements are slow and jerky at first, but when this amazing pressure begins to build up in my lower stomach, I work my hand up and down much faster. Katniss doesn't stop watching me. "Let me finish you off."

I take away my hand, and Katniss starts moving her own hand up and down. This tingling is beginning to spread through my body, my sac tightens, and I'm teetering on the edge of something I can't quite explain.

It all happens so fast. She pumps her fist, my cock pulses in her hand, and then a strangled cry flies from my lips and white, hot liquid spurts out of the head and shoots onto Katniss' stomach.

"Oh my God." It's the first time I've ever said the Lord's name in vain. I'm doing all these things I've never done because of Katniss.

She grabs a few napkins and wipes the creamy liquid off her stomach. My cock is still pulsing, but it's not hurting anymore. I'm relaxed and sleepy.

"That wasn't so bad, right?" she asks with a soft laugh.

I pull up my pants and underwear, still coming down from this incredible high. "It was the best thing in the entire world."

Katniss kisses my cheek before dressing herself. "I'm not done with you," she whispers against my lips. "We will continue this another time."

* * *

The scalding hot water and soap leaves my skin feeling raw. I can't believe what I've done. How could–I should have been stronger and resisted the temptation, but Katniss pressing up against my body made it impossible to resist her.

My mind flashes to Delly and her creamy, soft skin and luscious lips. Her breasts are much bigger than Katniss', and I've always wanted to feel them in my hands, but I know she wouldn't allow it.

I grab my shaft and begin stroking it that way I did earlier, picturing Delly wrapping her hands around me, rubbing the moisture that begins to seep out of the tip.

I try and focus on Delly's blonde hair and smooth skin, but all I can see is a thick patch of curls glistening between Katniss' legs. She didn't let me touch her, but I can almost imagine how that sticky substance would feel on my fingers.

A few final strokes and that incredible sensation of relief washes over me. I watch my semen fall down the drain, leaving no evidence of what I've just done.

I'm filthy. I need to stop having these thoughts, but I'm powerless. I rest my head against the cool tile, taking in a deep breath. "God, please forgive me."

* * *

Katniss hasn't been back to the bakery yet. I've thought about calling her on the number she left for the cake order, but I don't want to scare her away.

I look out at the large storefront window of the bakery, and I see her. She's not smiling. I'm hoping she's coming in here to see me so we can meet up again, but then I see a tall, dark-haired man following closely behind her.

The mysterious man grabs her arm to spin her around. Katniss looks upset at first, but I see her expression change to something softer.

I almost throw up when I see him press his lips to hers.


End file.
